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About Vila Nova de Gaia

Now, lemme tell ya, findin’ a prostitute ain’t like orderin’ Popeyes. You can’t just roll up and say, “Gimme the two-piece special!” Naw, honey, it’s sneaky, shady, and wild. Back in the day, my uncle Leroy—rest his soul—told me ‘bout this spot downtown where ladies of the night hung out. Said they’d wink at ya from the corner, real subtle-like. Little known fact: some of ‘em used code words, like “You got a light?”—meanin’ they ready to negotiate! Halleluyer, I was shocked! Who knew they had a whole system?

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I’m sweating bullets, man. I’m running around, trying to catch this little punk. I’m dodging commuters, and I swear, one lady almost spills her coffee on me. I’m like, “Lady, I’m not the one you should be mad at!” Finally, I corner him near the vending machines. I’m feeling like a hero, right? But then, outta nowhere, a pigeon swoops down and distracts me. The rat bolts! I’m cursing under my breath. “Stupid bird!”

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