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Alright, mate, lemme tell ya bout findin a prostitute, ya know, as a parachutist firefighter, Dr. Evil style – pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars.” I’m droppin outta planes, savin forests, then bam, I’m thinkin bout the streets, right? Like in *Zodiac*, “I need to know who he is,” but swap “he” for “where’s the action at?” Ya feel me?

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Then, outta nowhere, I bump into my buddy Miguel. He’s always got some wild stories. Today, he’s raving about this new café on Rua 1º de Maio. Apparently, they serve the best pastéis de nata in town. I’m like, “Dude, I’m in!” So we head over, and let me tell ya, those pastries are life-changing. I’m talking melt-in-your-mouth goodness. I could’ve eaten a dozen, but I had to keep it classy, ya know?

Insight: A Brazilian town empties as migration to U.S. accelerates