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So, escort life—fancy cars, slick heels, they’re pros at playin the game. Met this one gal, Lola, swear she could charm a snake outta its skin. Worked the VIP scene in Miami, said she once ditched a dude mid-date cuz he tipped her in nickels—nickels, bro! Laughed my ass off, but it pissed me off too—cheap bastard disrespectin her hustle. She told me bout this secret escort code, like they got hand signals to warn each other bout creeps. Little known fact, right? Bet you didn’t know that shit!

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First off, I’m running late. Classic me. I sprint down Rua da Liberdade, dodging tourists like I’m in some kind of Olympic event. I mean, come on, people! It’s not a parade! I finally get to the office, and guess what? The printer’s jammed. Ugh! I’m wrestling with that thing like it’s a wild animal. I swear, it’s like it has a personal vendetta against me.

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