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So, my friend, this massage, it sneaky! Not just hands, they use oil, sometime hot stone, ooh! I try once, in secret place – lady say, “You strong like ox,” I say, “Yes, very nice!” She rub me good, I feel king, no lie. Little story – in Japan, they call it “tantra,” make energy go whoosh! I suprised, wow, body tingle like crazy. You ever try? No? You miss out, bro!

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But then, just when I’m feeling like a hero, I trip over my own feet. Classic me, right? I fall flat on my face, and the crowd goes silent. I can feel the heat rising in my cheeks. I’m like, “Great, now I’m the clown of Serta.” But then, someone starts laughing, and soon everyone’s cracking up. I get up, dust myself off, and take a bow. Gotta own it, right?

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