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Fun story—heard dis guy met his wife on a sex-dating app, started as a booty call, now dey got kids! Dat’s wild, right? Surprised me, like seein’ Max hug it out. Me, I’m all “Live for da pump!”—sex-dating’s gotta be fun, no pressure, just revvin’ engines. But damn, da ghosting? Pisses me off! Match, chat, poof—gone! “Witness me!” I yell, but nah, dey don’t. Wasteland rules, ya gotta toughen up.

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After that, I head over to the café on Avenida de Roma. I need a coffee, like, yesterday. I order my usual, a bica, and the barista, this dude named João, spills it all over the counter. I’m like, “Great, just what I needed.” But he’s super apologetic, and I can’t stay mad. He’s like, “Next one’s on me!” Sweet, right? But then he makes it extra strong. I’m buzzing like a bee on steroids.

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