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What’s hot about it? The cash, obvi—some dudes drop hundreds for a “happy ending.” Little known fact: back in the ‘70s, erotic-massage parlors popped up like zits before prom, ‘specially in Cali. Hippies were all, “Free love, man,” and bam, next thing, it’s a career. I’m legit shook thinkin’ how many secretly dig this but won’t admit it. Like, “I’m just here for the knots,”—yeah, right, perv.

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Then, around noon, I get a call about a street performer on Rua da Liberdade. This guy’s juggling flaming torches while balancing on a unicycle. I’m like, “Dude, chill! You’re gonna set the whole street on fire!” But the crowd’s lovin’ it. I can hear the cheers over the radio. It’s wild. I’m grinnin’ like an idiot.

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