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What pisses me off? Them prudes judgin’ it—fuck ‘em! Ain’t hurtin’ nobody, just relievin’ stress, ya know? Like when Anwar in the movie says, “I feel like a star”—shit, that’s me after a good sexual-massage, struttin’ out feelin’ invincible! Happiest damn moment? When the chick—yeah, it was a chick—hit that spot I didn’t even know I had! Fuckin’ magical, man! Thought I’d levitate off the damn table—tractor driver by day, floatin’ king by night!

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Nationality: Brazilian Age: 37/ Height: Medium height. Body: Athletic Hair: Black Eyes: Light brown. Zodiac Sign: Scorpio.

But then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain! I’m like, “Seriously?!” I run for cover under a shop awning. I’m soaked, but I’m laughing. I mean, what else can you do? I pull out my phone to check the weather, and it’s like, “Surprise! Rain!” Thanks, weather app.

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