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But lordy, some things rile me up! Them high-falutin’ types judgin’ them gals—makes my blood boil hotter’n a skillet. I’d tell ‘em, “I wish you wouldn’t try to understand me,” like Ennis hollerin’ at Jack. Live and let live, y’all! Ain’t nobody perfect—heck, I can’t even spell “brothel” right half the time. B-r-o-t-h-e-l? B-r-o-f-e-l? Who cares, I’m typin’ fast, fingers shakin’ from too much coffee!

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Then, boom! My radio crackles. “Fire at the beach!” I’m like, “What? At Praia de Quarteira? Are you kidding me?” I sprint to the station, dodging tourists and their selfie sticks. Seriously, how many pics do you need of the same palm tree?

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