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About Funchal

I exaggerate, sure. Once I swore I saw a prostitute who looked like a goddess, all glowy and stuff! Turned out she was just standin’ under a streetlight! [slaps forehead, laughs] Daft me! But that’s the thrill, ya know? The hunt, the chase, like fishin’ but with more drama!

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Any specific bars or cafes you would recommend that have a young population rather than old people in Porto? Preferably close to the old town and the.

I rush over, and it’s a scene. People are shoutin’, flingin’ fish, and I’m just standin’ there, tryin’ to figure out how to break it up. I’m thinkin’, “This is not in my job description.” But I dive in, and somehow, I manage to calm everyone down. I’m like, “Guys, it’s just fish! Let’s not turn this into a seafood war!”

Property by the sea in Portugal: where is it cheapest to buy and rent?