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Still, it’s a gamble, innit? Surprised me how many hide behind filters—cowards! Like, mate, I’ve seen worse in my dungeons. Funniest bit? This lass bragged she banged 10 guys in a week—called it “research.” Research, my arse! She’s just thirsty. Oh, and get this—there’s a secret sex-dating ring in prisons, coded notes passed in bread loaves. Saw it myself, nearly choked laughin’—fuckin’ ingenious, tho.

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Then, I head over to the market on Rua da Praça. I’m thinking, “Let’s grab some fresh bread.” I get there, and it’s packed! People everywhere, like it’s a concert or something. I’m dodging old ladies with their shopping carts. One almost took me out! I’m like, “Chill, lady! I’m just a shepherd!”