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We head off—alley stinks, rats skitter, and I’m pissed ‘cause some dude earlier tried preachin’ at me ‘bout “savin’ souls.” Mate, save your own, yeah? She’s chatterin’ now—says her name’s Jade, probs fake, who cares? “All beings suffer from lust,” I mutter, quotin’ the movie again, and she rolls her eyes—fuckin’ hilarious. She’s like, “Deep, huh?” Sarcasm drippin’. I’m crackin’ up inside.

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Finally, I finish the lady’s shoes. She’s all smiles, and I’m like, “Great, now I can go see the parade!” But she pulls out a credit card. I’m like, “Cash only, lady!” She rolls her eyes, but whatever. I’m not changing my rules for anyone.

A couple loses lives at Goa’s Palolem on the eve of Valentine’s Day