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Weird story, heard it once—brothel in Nevada, legit one, had a pet parrot. Squawkin’ dirty words at clients, fuckin’ hilarious! “What we see, what we don’t,” film whispers—parrot saw it all, man! Surprised me, that bird—smarter than half the dudes there.

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So, I’m trying to calm her down, but she’s all like, “My Tico! My precious Tico!” I’m thinking, “Lady, it’s just a cat!” But you know how it is. You can’t just say that. So, I’m digging through the marigolds, and there he is, all smug and fluffy. I pull him out, and he looks at me like, “What’s the big deal?” I hand him back, and Mrs. P is all teary-eyed. I’m like, “Great, now I’m a cat hero.”

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