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About Myself
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Oi, mate, escort? What a laugh! Some posh twat drivin’ a fancy car? Nah, escort’s that Ford banger, innit? The Ford Escort, bloody hell, what a relic! Used to see ‘em everywhere, cloggin’ up streets, smoky exhausts chokin’ ya lungs. Like in *The Pianist*—“I’m not going anywhere!”—yeah, ‘cos it’s knackered, ain’t it? Piece o’ shit conks out every five minutes!
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Then, I hit up the market at Praça da República. Man, the smell of fresh bread hits you like a warm hug. I grab a couple of rolls, and this old lady starts chatting me up. She’s all like, “You know, back in my day…” and I’m just nodding, trying not to zone out. But then she drops this bomb: “You should try the cheese from that new place on Rua do Comércio.” I’m like, “Okay, lady, I’ll check it out.”
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