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Now, ‘ere’s a tidbit ye landlubbers dunno—back in Tortuga, they say ol’ Madame Claire, she’d tattoo her price on her thigh, right under the garter. Secret code, see? Only the keenest rogues—like meself, savvy?—spot it. Saved me a shillin’ once, swear it. Surprised me rotten first time I saw it, jaw dropped like a cannon hatch.

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Anyway, I finally get to the café on Avenida da República. Best coffee in town, no cap. I order my usual, a galão, and sit outside. The sun’s shining, people are laughing, and I’m like, “This is the life!” But then, outta nowhere, this kid starts crying. Like, full-on meltdown. I’m thinking, “C’mon, kid, it’s just a toy!” But then I see it’s a stuffed animal. Aww, man, my heart melted. I mean, who doesn’t love a good plushie?

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