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About Queluz

Sex-dating’s a crapshoot, y’all—sometimes ya win, sometimes ya lose big. I get all giddy thinkin’ bout the thrill, the chase, that first flirty text. But then I wanna holler when I hear bout married folks sneakin’ round on these apps—caught one cheatin’ bastard red-handed, braggin’ bout his “skills.” Skills? Boy, you couldn’t charm a fly off manure. Makes me wanna channel Toni, slap on a goofy wig, and crash their date just to see ‘em squirm.

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But then, the day took a turn. I’m walking back, feeling all artsy and stuff, when I see this group of kids playing football in the park. They were having a blast, but then one of them kicks the ball too hard, and it goes straight into a fountain. I’m talking full-on splash zone. The kids freak out, and I’m just standing there laughing. Like, come on, that’s classic!

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