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I tried it once, swear, got this tiny masseuse – hands like freakin’ magic wands! She’s kneadin’ my back, and I’m thinkin’, “I’ve lived 15 years for this!” – total *Oldboy* revenge-vibe, but, like, in a good way. Made me happy as hell, tension gone, poof! But then, ugh, this one time – shady parlor, dude with creepy paws, no vibe check, total disaster. Pissed me off, wasted my bucks! No capes, no creeps, I say!

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I finally decide to head to the park on Avenida do Brasil to clear my head. It’s a beautiful day, and I see families, kids playing, and I’m just standing there, feeling all the feels. I’m like, “Why can’t my life be this simple?” I sit on a bench, and this little kid runs by, tripping and falling right in front of me. He starts crying, and I’m like, “Oh no, not the tears!” But then his mom picks him up, and he’s laughing in seconds. Kids are resilient, man.

Woman lived with her dad's mummified corpse for 15 years until she died herself