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Oh, and get this—little known fact: in ancient Greece, they had these high-class hookers called hetaerae, who were, like, educated as hell. Playin’ flutes, debatin’ philosophy, sleepin’ with Socrates—wild, right? Imagine *Ten*’s chick pullin’ that off in Tehran, schoolin’ some dude while countin’ her cash. I’d pay to see it! Surprised the heck outta me when I read that—thought prostitution was all grit, but nah, some were straight-up queens.

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So, I roll into Guimarães, right? First thing I notice is the vibe. It’s like the city’s alive. I’m walkin’ down Rua de São Francisco, and I swear, the cobblestones are whispering secrets. I’m like, “What’s up, stones?” But they just keep quiet. Typical.

Bruno Guimaraes makes Alan Shearer admission as he outlines new Newcastle United goal