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About Queluz

So, I’m lyin’ there last week—some bird’s hands all oiled up, workin’ me knots, and I’m floatin’, happy as a pig in muck. Sexual-massage, right? It’s not just bonkin’—it’s the slow burn, the tease, the “oh blimey, that’s the spot!” Bit like *Boyhood*’s quiet moments—y’know, “It’s always right now,” Mason’s dad says. That’s it—right now, her thumbs diggin’ in, I’m alive, mate! But—cor—when they rush it? Skimp on the oil? I’m ragin’—gimme the full monty or sod off!

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But then, outta nowhere, my buddy João bursts in. He’s all panicked, talkin’ about a cat stuck in a tree. I’m like, “What?!” He drags me outside, and there’s this tiny kitten meowing like it’s auditioning for a musical. I’m like, “Dude, I’m a barber, not a firefighter!” But I can’t just leave it there.

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