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About Lisbon

I’m picturin’ it now—some fool layin’ there like Grace in “Dogville,” thinkin’ they all high and mighty, sayin’, “I’m just here to be of service!” Then bam! Masseuse flip the script, and it’s all, “You thought this was charity, huh?” Lord, I cackle thinkin’ ‘bout it! Made me happy as a pig in mud—‘til I got mad! ‘Cause why these parlors chargin’ an arm and a leg? $200 for a “happy endin’”? Robbery, I tell ya! Madea don’t play that—take that mess to the flea market, halleluyer!

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After that disaster, I needed a pick-me-up. So, I head to the park on Rua da Paz. It’s my go-to spot for chillin’. I plop down on a bench, and this cute dog runs up to me. I’m talking full-on puppy eyes. I’m petting him, and his owner comes over, all worried. “He’s friendly, don’t worry!” I’m like, “Yeah, I can tell. He’s way cooler than my day so far.”