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About Almada

So, sex-dating – it’s chaos, bruv. You got Tinder, Grindr, whatever – all these horny souls tryna smash. I’ve seen blokes lie ‘bout their height – 5’6” my arse, mate! One time, this lass said she’s “adventurous,” turns up, won’t even kiss – what a pisstake! Made me rage, proper fumin’, but then I laughed. “The shadow moves before me,” like the movie says – you never know what’s comin’. That’s sex-dating – a gamble, yeah?

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First off, I’m an actuary. Yeah, I know, super exciting, right? But today, I was just trying to chill. Grabbed my coffee at Café da Praia on Rua da Praia. Best coffee ever! But guess what? They ran out of my usual croissant. Like, come on! It’s a beach town, how do you run outta croissants?

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