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I tried it once—erotic-massage, not mayo—well, maybe mayo too, don’t judge! The lady was all pro, hands like magic, and I’m sittin’ there goin’, “This is better than starfish naps!” But then—ugh, get this—she used some weird smelly oil. Made me mad! Like, “Yo, this ain’t *The New World* vibes!” I wanted that “sweet scent of earth” feel, y’know, like when John Smith’s all poetic and stuff. Not stinky feet lotion! Gimme lavender or somethin’ sexy, jeez!

Masseuses - Fenix

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Then, I hit up a bar on Rua da Estação. I needed a drink after that day. I order a beer, and the bartender’s like, “You look like you need it.” I’m like, “You have no idea, my friend.” We start chatting, and he tells me about this hidden gem of a restaurant nearby. I’m intrigued.

Full coverage of Caxias vs Fluminense game on Wednesday 5th of March at 22:00 including match guide, data analysis, probability analysis, standings, previous meetings and form guide.