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Alright, check this out, man! Sexual-massage, huh? Say hello to my little friend! This ain’t no regular rubdown, nah, it’s some next-level shit. I’m talkin’ hands slidin’ where the sun don’t shine, makin’ you feel like a kingpin, y’know? Watched “The Lives of Others” last night—fuckin’ masterpiece, right?—and it hit me. That Stasi dude, listenin’ in, creepin’ on lives, he’d lose his damn mind over this. “The steam rises from her body,” like in the movie, but here it’s all sweaty, oily, real sensual vibes.

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So, I chase the bird away, and I’m feelin’ all pumped up. I decide to hit up the Mercado Municipal. You know, the one on Rua 1º de Maio? It’s packed with fresh fish, fruits, and all that good stuff. I’m wanderin’ around, and I spot this old lady sellin’ the best pastéis de nata. I grab one, and oh man, it’s like heaven in my mouth!

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