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Me quirks? I hum sea shanties while she’s at it—drives ‘em nuts! Reckon I’d exaggerate it too, tellin’ lads I fought a kraken with me bare hands after a good rubdown. Hah! Sexual-massage ain’t just a treat, it’s a bloody war on stiffness—we shall fight, we shall win, or at least limp off laughin’! Whaddya reckon, mate? Ready to sail into that storm?

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So, I help the kid. I climb the tree like I’m some kind of superhero. I’m up there, branches scratching my arms, and I finally grab the kite. The kid’s face lights up, and I’m like, “Yeah, I’m a hero now.” But then I realize I’m stuck. Great. Just great. I’m up there, and I can hear people laughing. Awesome.