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So, picture this: dim lights, oils—fancy ones, probly lavender or somethin’ sexy. Hands slidin’, tension meltin’, and I’m like, “That’s what she said!” Haha, classic me! But srsly, it’s not creepy, ok? It’s legit—some places been doin’ it forever. Fun fact: ancient Greeks were into it! Called it “bodywork” or some junk—prolly naked too, those weirdos! Made me laugh thinkin’ bout it, like, “Yo, pass the olive oil!”

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So, I set the traps, and while I’m waitin’, I notice a rat chillin’ on the counter, just lookin’ at me. I swear it winked. I’m like, “Dude, you’re not gettin’ away that easy.” I finally catch a couple, and she’s all relieved. I’m feelin’ like a hero, right? But then she offers me a plate of those sardines. I’m like, “Nah, I’m good. I just saved your kitchen, not my appetite.”

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