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Aight, listen up, you filthy hippies! Erotic-massage, huh? Respect my authoritah! I’m the freakin’ king of this shit. So, lemme tell ya, it’s all about hands slidin’ everywhere, makin’ ya feel all tingly and crap. Watched “Blue Is the Warmest Color” – damn, that movie’s got some steamy vibes, like, “I want to feel you” level of hotness. Makes me wanna yell, “SWEET!” when I think of erotic-massage.

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So, I hit the streets around 9 AM. The sun was shining, and I was feeling good. I strolled down Rua da Liberdade, you know, the one with all the cute cafés. I grabbed a bica (that’s espresso for ya) at my fave spot, Café Central. The barista, Miguel, always hooks me up with a smile. But today? He spilled coffee all over the counter. I mean, come on, Miguel! I was like, “Dude, you good?” He just laughed it off. Classic Miguel.

Center Field — Yes It’s An "Area Of Need"