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About Funchal

Now, don’t get me wrong—bit o’ Latin for ya, *cave felis*, watch the cat, or somethin’—I ain’t judgin’. Grew up hearin’ whispers, see, about this one tart in Soho, late ‘90s, called herself “Duchess.” Proper legend, she was—bloke once paid her in gold sovereigns, no kiddin’! Swear it’s true, heard it from me mate Dave, who’s a right nutter but honest. Made me chuckle, that—gold coins for a quick shag? Blimey, inflation’s a bugger!

Means bitch ,its a bad word.

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After that, I decide to stroll down Avenida da República. It’s packed, as usual. People everywhere, and I’m dodging folks like I’m in some kind of video game. I spot this cute little bakery, and I’m like, “Yes, please!” I grab a pastel de nata, and OMG, it’s heavenly. I’m talking about the kind of pastry that makes you forget your problems. But then, I spill some on my shirt. Classic me, right?

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