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But dude, some of these places—gross! Saw this X post ‘bout a brothel in Nevada, legal and all, but stank like old socks. Made me gag, man, for real! Eat my shorts, who’d pay for that? Then there’s this story—some pirate in the 1700s ran a brothel ship. A frickin’ ship! Sailin’ around, bangin’ at sea—argh, matey, that’s nuts! Can’t make this up, swear.

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Brothel · Mistress (hard) · Sex in Different Positions · Dirtytalk · Blowjob without Condom · 69 Position · Pornstar Experience (PSE) · Girlfriend Experience (GFE).

As I’m leaving, I bump into my buddy, Miguel. He’s always got the craziest stories. He tells me about this time he tried to charm a snake for a spell and ended up getting bitten. I’m laughing so hard, I almost drop my oranges.