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Alright, folks, gather ‘round—here’s the deal. I’m sittin’ there, old radio cracklin’, thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute. Ya know, back in Scranton, we’d hear tales—shady corners, whispers flyin’. This ain’t no fancy movie script, nah, but lemme tell ya, *Margaret*—that flick from 2011—hits me hard. “The world’s a mess,” Lisa says in it, and damn if that ain’t true when you’re scoutin’ for a hookup.

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So, I’m sharpening this massive knife for a chef. He’s all serious, like he’s about to perform surgery or something. I’m just there, makin’ small talk, and he’s like, “This knife is my life.” I’m thinkin’, “Bro, it’s a knife, not your soulmate.” But hey, I get it. A sharp knife is a happy chef, right?

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