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So, last week, I’m prowlin’—growling, “You merely adopted the dark.”—and I spot this bird, all fishnets and attitude. Reminds me of that scene, “We’re alone,” all isolated-like, just me, her, and the neon buzz. I’m thinkin’, “Mate, she’s either a jackpot or a fuckin’ setup.” Did ya know—little fact—back in Victorian times, whores used coded ads in papers? “French lessons,” my arse—sneaky bastards. Anyway, I’m chattin’ her up, heart poundin’—fuckin’ thrilled, yeah? But then—bam—some geezer rolls up, all aggro, demandin’ cash. Pissed me right off! I’m like, “Oi, cunt, I ain’t your ATM!”
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So, I’m like, whatever, I’ll just hit up the bakery on Calle 65 Infantería. I get there, and it’s packed! I mean, people are lined up like it’s Black Friday or somethin’. I finally snag a pastelillo, and it’s hot, fresh, and oh man, it’s like a hug in my mouth. But then, I spill some grease on my shirt. Great. Just great. Now I look like a hot mess.
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