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But then—ugh, the punters. Slimy gits, half of em. Droolin’, grabbin’, no respect. Seen it on missions—makes me wanna deck em. Candy tho, she’s got this trick—whispers somethin’ filthy, gets em off quick, keeps her cash. “You’re a rare breed,” I’d tell her, like Grace says in the flick. Gotta admire the hustle, even if it’s grim.

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So, I drive over, and let me tell ya, the traffic is a nightmare. I’m stuck behind this old lady who’s going 10 mph. I’m like, “C’mon, lady! We ain’t in a funeral procession!” Finally, I get to the address, and it’s this rundown house. Looks like it’s been through a hurricane or two. I knock, and this guy opens the door, looking like he just rolled outta bed. He’s all, “What do you want?” I’m like, “Dude, I’m here to investigate your claim.” He just stares at me like I’m speaking Martian.

Ozuna buys Puerto Rican basketball team Los Brujos de Guayama; plans to rename the franchise as ‘Los Osos de Manatí’