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Oh, and the laughs! She’d mock me hat, callin’ it a “dead bird’s nest.” I’d fire back, “Least I ain’t sellin’ me arse!” She’d cackle, say, “Ye’d fetch a penny, tops!” Proper banter, that. Still, I’d wager she’d seen hell—whores always do. Them scars on her arm? Never asked, but I’d bet me ship they weren’t from no lover’s spat.

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Finally, the rain stops. I’m like, “Okay, let’s turn this day around.” I decide to hit up a local shop on Calle de la Amistad. They have the best merch. I walk in, and it’s like a treasure trove. I’m grabbing stuff left and right. But then, I see this shirt. It’s perfect. I go to pay, and my card gets declined. I’m like, “Are you kidding me?!”

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