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Oi, precious! Escorts, eh? We hates em, yesss, but loves em too! Slimy little creatures, struttin’ round like they owns the streets. Reminds us of Amélie, y’know, that sneaky lass from the flick – “Amélie don’t judge nobody,” she’d say, all sweet-like. Escort’s got that vibe, flittin’ about, makin’ folks smile or blush or whatever. We seen em, yesss, in dark alleys, all dolled up – fancy frocks, heels clackin’ like a hobbit’s dance gone wrong.

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. I mean, like, torrential downpour. I’m sprinting for cover, coffee flying everywhere. I’m soaked, and my mood? Down the drain with the rain. I’m standing under this awning on Calle de la Esperanza, just cursing my luck.

Spain's Canal de Isabel II allocates over €2 billion to strengthen the service