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Alright, listen up, pal! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here bakin’ bread, thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute. Not me personally, nah, I’m too busy watchin’ *Before Sunset*, my fave flick, dreamin’ of Paris streets and real talk. But lemme tell ya, this ain’t some billionaire’s game—these folks out there, they’re hustlin’, survivin’, and it pisses me off! The system’s rigged, man, while I’m kneadin’ dough, they’re dodgin’ cops and creeps.

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Okay, first off, you gotta wheel around Calle Comercio. That street’s the heart, ya know? It’s busy and charming in a kinda quirky way. Seriously, I swear, I can literally see Russia from my window sometimes—like, the world is just whizzing by. Then there’s Plaza de la Cultura, where locals gossip, kids run, and time feels like it slows down for a sec. Every time I walk there after work, I feel… something. A mix of calm and “Whoa, am I in a Béla Tarr movie?” I even whisper those movie lines to myself.

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