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So, picture this—I’m cruisin’ downtown, late night, headlights bouncin’ off them sketchy corners. Ain’t no fancy apps back in the day, nah, you had to *feel* it out. Like Graysmith in *Zodiac*, sniffin’ clues, I’m squintin’ at every alley. “Is that her? Nah, that’s a dude.” Made me mad as hell—wastin’ time, gas, my dang patience! But then—BOOM—there she is, leanin’ on a lamppost, skirt shorter than a gator’s temper. Happy don’t even cover it, y’all—I’m hollerin’ like a hog at a barbecue.

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Man, today was a wild ride in Gurabo! Like, I woke up thinking it was just another boring day, but boy, was I wrong. First off, I hit the streets of Calle San Antonio, and lemme tell ya, the traffic was a mess. I mean, come on! It’s not like we’re in San Juan or something. But nah, everyone and their grandma decided to drive today. I was stuck behind this old dude in a beat-up Toyota. Like, bro, you’re not in a race. Chill!

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