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Aight, listen up, you filthy animals! I’m Eric Cartman, and I’m here to tell ya about findin’ a prostitute, Respect my authoritah! So, I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’ ‘bout my fave movie, *The Social Network* – ya know, that badass flick where Zuckerberg screws everyone over, “You don’t get to 500 million friends without makin’ a few enemies,” right? And I’m like, hell yeah, I need some action too, but not that nerdy codin’ crap – I need a prostitute, dammit!
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We’re flyin’ past Calle de la Playa, and I’m just tryin’ to keep my cool. I’m shoutin’, “You got this, girl!” But she’s off in her own world. I swear, I saw a dog on the side of the road, and she almost tried to race it. Like, c’mon!
Puerto Rico 6 months later: The voice in the Maria flooding viral video
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