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About Mayaguez

Alright, so I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’—find a prostitute, huh? Pretty, pretty good idea, maybe, but oh boy, here we go. I mean, where do ya even start? Back in the day, you’d flip through some shady phonebook—yeah, those existed! Now it’s all apps, websites, total mess. I’m no Carlos, y’know, slinkin’ through Europe, dodgin’ cops, pickin’ up ladies like it’s nothin’. Me? I’d trip over my own feet tryin’ to look cool. “I’m an international man!”—nah, I’m Larry, sweatin’ through my shirt.

In today’s world you can find pretty much anything with a smartphone.

Canovanas Brothel Puerto, Mistress (hard), Full Body Sensual Massage, Striptease/Lapdance, Full Body Sensual Massage.

Then, I decided to stroll down Calle 2. Man, the vibes were lit! Kids were playin’ ball, and the smell of empanadillas was in the air. I was like, “I need one of those!” But then, outta nowhere, this dog runs past me, and I trip over my own feet. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out on the sidewalk, and everyone’s laughin’. I just laughed it off, but inside, I was like, “Why, universe, why?”

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