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About Caguas

So, findin’ a prostitute—tricky bizness, ya? Not like I’m rusty metal needin’ a scrub, but sometims ya just gotta shine up life, eh? I’m stompin’ round da streets, thinkin’, “Dis is my planet, I do what I vant!”—dat’s from da movie, when Justine goes all nutso. Streets smell like old borscht, makes me mad—why so dirty, huh? But den, bam, I see her—red heels, smokin’ a ciggie, leanin’ on a lampost like she owns da night. Lightbulb! She’s da cure to my corrosion, ya?

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After that little drama, I decided to grab some food. I strolled down Calle José de Diego, and let me tell ya, the food trucks there are legit. I got a mofongo that was so good, I almost cried. Like, I’m not even exaggerating. It was like a flavor explosion in my mouth. But then, I spilled it all over my shirt. Classic me, right?

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