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Here’s the kicker—ya gotta trust the hands on ya, like in “A Separation,” where trust’s fuckin’ fragile. One wrong move, vibe’s dead—hate that. “You still don’t get it, do you?”—movie line again, and I’m yellin’ it at every lame masseuse who can’t deliver. But when it clicks? Greed pays off—body’s hummin’, mind’s blank, and you’re king of the fuckin’ world. Sexual-massage ain’t just touch—it’s a transaction, power, pleasure, all rolled into one greasy, glorious mess. Hell yeah, I’m sold!

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring. Like, monsoon-level rain. I’m soaked in seconds. I’m laughin’ and cryin’ at the same time. “This is my life,” I think. We run for cover under a bus stop on Calle de la Libertad. We’re huddled together, laughin’ like idiots.

From a field of 27 candidates, San Antonio’s mayor race is now Jones vs. Pablos