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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals! I’m Judge Judy, bouncer-style, and I’m here to spill the tea on whores—yep, them ladies of the night! Don’t pee on my leg and call it rain, I ain’t here for no sugarcoatin’. Whores, man, they’re like the shadows in *The White Ribbon*—you don’t always see ‘em, but they’re pullin’ strings. “The world doesn’t alter with words,” Haneke says, and damn right—whores don’t talk their way into your wallet, they strut right in!

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Finally, I get it workin’. Thank the heavens! I start blastin’ away, and it feels good. The dust flies, and I’m in my zone. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs up to me. He’s like, “Mister, can I help?” I’m thinkin’, “Help? You’re like, what, ten?” But he’s got this look in his eyes, all eager and stuff. So, I let him hold the hose for a bit.

Figure 11. Daily Sun Newspaper front page covering weather event at the...