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Alright, listen up, you little bastards! I’m Eric Cartman, industrialist genius, and I’m gonna tell ya ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, ‘kay? RESPECT MY AUTHORITAH! So, I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout my fave movie, *Moonrise Kingdom*, that sweet-ass Wes Anderson flick, and it hits me—findin’ a hooker’s like Sam and Suzy runnin’ off to bang in the woods, but with more cash and less scout badges, ya know?
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Then, outta nowhere, this old lady named Doña Rosa shows up. She’s a regular, always bringing her little chihuahua, Chiquito. That dog is a legend! Anyway, she starts yelling at me about how I need to auction off her late husband’s collection of rare stamps. I’m like, “Lady, I’m not a stamp dealer!” But she’s persistent, and I can’t say no to her. She’s got that fierce grandma vibe, ya know?
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