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Now, lemme tell ya, I saw one the other day—rusted heap, bless its heart, still chuggin’ like it owned the road. Made me happy as a pig in mud! I mean, who don’t love an underdog? But—Lordy, don’t get me started—I saw some fool peel out in one, tires screamin’ like a banshee, and I thought, “Honey, that *Escort* ain’t built for that!” Made me madder’n a wet hen—give the lil darlin’ some respect!
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First off, I hit up Calle Santiago, my usual coffee spot. You know, the one with the best café con leche? Yeah, that one. But guess what? They ran outta coffee! Like, how do you run outta coffee in a coffee-loving town? I was ready to throw a fit. I mean, c’mon!
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