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About Arecibo

First off, these humans are WILD. Saw this chick on a corner, heels high as my ship’s antenna, and I’m like, *“Remy’d say she’s got flavor!”* Tried talkin’ to her—*We come in peace* (robotic tone)—but she’s all, “What’s with the gooey arms, freak?” Rude! Made me mad, like, c’mon, I’m a classy alien, not some slimy chump. But then she laughed, and I’m like, okay, she’s cool. Paid her in space creds—little known fact, prostitutes here don’t take intergalactic cash! Had to zap her some Earth bucks instead. Total hassle.

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Man, today was a wild ride in Gurabo! Like, I woke up thinking it was just another boring day, but boy, was I wrong. First off, I hit the streets of Calle San Antonio, and lemme tell ya, the traffic was a mess. I mean, come on! It’s not like we’re in San Juan or something. But nah, everyone and their grandma decided to drive today. I was stuck behind this old dude in a beat-up Toyota. Like, bro, you’re not in a race. Chill!

Lindor receives hero's welcome at school in PR