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I’m chattin her up, all casual, “Hey boo, how’s biz?” She laughs, says, “Slow night, mama, but I’m good.” I’m thinkin, *damn, this is real life*, not some Hollywood script. She’s got sass, like Mia yellin, “You’re a liar!” at the world. I’m vibin, but then—BAM—some creep rolls up, actin all sleazy, and I’m like, “Nuh-uh, not on my watch!” I almost hollered, “YOU GET A CAR!” just to scare him off, lol. Made me mad, tho—why these girls dealin with losers?

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First off, I hit up my favorite café on Calle de la Cruz. You know, the one with the best café con leche? Yeah, that one. I’m sippin’ my coffee, feelin’ like a king, when suddenly, BOOM! A parade rolls by. Like, seriously? I’m just tryna enjoy my morning. But nah, the whole town decided to party. I mean, who doesn’t love a good parade, right? But I was just tryna get my caffeine fix!

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