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Oi mate, so erotic-massage, yeah? *beep boop* Robotic Hawking here, cosmic vibes flowin’. Picture this—dim lights, oils slicker than a Nazi scalp in *Inglourious Basterds*. Love that flick, man—Brad Pitt yellin’, “We’re in the killin’ business!” Same energy, but, like, with rubdowns. Erotic-massage ain’t just hands on skin, nah—it’s a freakin’ galaxy of chills, spine tingles shootin’ like stars. Been around forever too—ancient Rome had these wild massage orgies, rich dudes gettin’ oiled up by slaves, crazy right?

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Then, I head to the Parque de la Libertad. It’s beautiful, man. Trees everywhere, people chillin’, kids playin’. I’m feelin’ good again. But then, outta nowhere, it starts rainin’. Like, seriously? I’m soaked in seconds. I’m runnin’ for cover, laughin’ at the absurdity of it all.

The House That Cidra Sebastien Helped Build