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Love how it’s all hush-hush tho—cloak ‘n’ dagger vibes. Kinda sexy, kinda sketch. Disgust from the flick’d be all, “Eww, gross, no way!” But me? I’m curious, man! What’s the wildest thing they’ve seen? Prolly some dude in a clown suit—swear that’s real! D’oh! Gotta respect the grind tho—takes guts. Next time I see one, I’m tippin’ my hat. “You rock, lady!” Now, where’s my Duff? Need a cold one after this!

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First stop? La Calle 1. I needed coffee, like, yesterday. I hit up my fave spot, Café Candelaria. The barista, this dude named Luis, he’s always got a smile. But today? Nah, he looked like he’d seen a ghost. Turns out, the espresso machine broke. I mean, c’mon! How do you run a café without espresso? I was ready to throw a fit, but then he offered me a cortadito. Sweetened the deal, ya know?

Urban Train expansion plans include route to Old San Juan