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I’d be all, “Hey, lady, got any stock tips?” And she’s like, “Honey, I got somethin’ better!” That’s what she said! Oh, man, I’d laugh so hard I’d cry. Prostitution’s old as dirt—fun fact, ancient Babylon had temple hookers, sacred stuff! Wild, right? Makes me happy thinkin’ bout history, but also mad—why’s it still a thing? Society, man, so messed up.

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Finally, I get to the pub, and my friends are already there. They’re laughing, and I’m like, “You guys won’t believe my day!” I tell them about the geese, the rain, and the kid on the bike. They’re cracking up!

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