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About Krakow

Mr. T’s seen it all, sucka! Walked downtown once, shady streets—pimps eyeballin’ me. Felt like Saul, lost in Auschwitz, “Where’s the rabbi?!” But here it’s, “Where’s the chick?!” Found one—Legs up to her neck! She’s smokin’ hot, but I’m thinkin’, “Man, this ain’t no picnic.” Cost me fifty bucks—fifty! Back in ’85, that was lunch money! Inflation’s a punk, I swear.

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Later, I hit up this local pub on ul. Wrzosowa. The vibe is super laid-back. I order a beer, and the bartender starts chatting me up. He’s telling me about Wiecbork’s history, how it used to be a big deal back in the day. I’m nodding along, but inside, I’m thinking, “Dude, I just want to drink my beer.” But he’s passionate, and I respect that.