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Now, I tried it once, yah? Was all tensed up from stealin’ moons—usual day for Gru. Dis chick, she’s kneadin’ me like dough, and I’m tinkin’, “Dis is nice, but where’s da catch?” Den—lightbulb!—she goes for da tingly spots, ya know, da ones dey don’t show in yoga class. I’m all, “What you gonna do wit dat?” like Sheriff Bell in da movie, all confused but kinda into it. Happy? Oh, I was floatin’, like Vector on his jetpack, but den—boom—angry! She charged me triple, said it’s “special service.” Robbery, I tell ya! Nearly flipped da table, but dem hands, dey were magic, so I let it slide.

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First off, I hit up the local café on ul. Piłsudskiego. You know, the one with the weirdly named pastries? I ordered a “Pinczowska Delight” or whatever. It was like biting into a sugar bomb. I swear, my teeth almost exploded. But hey, it was delish!

OUT OF LOVE FOR JAZZ - IN THE EYE OF THE CAMERA BY ANDRZEJ MOCHOŃ