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About Krakow

So I hit the streets, right? Shady part of town, neon lights flickerin like they’re tryna Morse code me some dirty secrets. I’m thinkin, “The cipher’s in the streets, man!”—straight outta *Zodiac*. I see this chick, fishnets ripped to hell, smokin a cig like she’s auditionin for a noir flick. I’m like, “Hey, you workin?” She squints at me, all sassy, “What’s it to ya, grandma?” Grandma?! Bitch, I’m Tina fuckin Fey, I’ll roast you from here to Siberia! Got me heated, but I laughed—props for guts, ya know?

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But then, outta nowhere, this old lady starts yelling. Turns out, her cat’s stuck in a tree. I’m like, “Lady, it’s a cat, not a lion!” But she’s frantic. So, I climb the tree. Yeah, me! The Herald, tree climber extraordinaire. I finally get the cat down, and she’s all teary-eyed. I’m feeling like a hero, but also thinking, “What’s next? Saving a dog from a burning building?”

Small town life: the shtetl through the eyes of an artist