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Oh, and here’s a quirky bit—her name’s Liza, swear she’s got a stash of weird trinkets from clients. One’s a carved frog—why, tho? In my head, I’m like, “Liza, you nutter, what’s with the frog?” Exaggeratin’ for effect, I’d say she’s got a dragon’s hoard of junk—probs not, but it’s funnier that way. “Some men just want to watch the world burn,” Joker’d say, and she’d nod, smirkin’, ‘cause she’s seen it all.

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I’m feeling like a hero, right? But then, I hear a loud crash. I turn around, and my team has knocked over a flower stand. Flowers are everywhere! I’m talking petals flying, people gasping. I’m like, “Guys, can we not?” But they’re too busy laughing.

Man brutally attacked with samurai sword in Poland